The Y NSW's Youth and Child Voice Manager, Carlee Heise, explains the importance of respecting a person's pronouns.
Happy International Pronouns Day! Today is about education and highlighting the importance of respecting a person’s pronouns. Pronouns are words that we use every day, and every person has a set of pronouns that they identify with.
It’s important to ask people what their pronouns are, as you can’t always tell just by looking at someone. By asking for someone’s pronouns and then using them when we refer to the person (even when they aren’t around), we are showing them that we respect them and their gender identity.
When someone’s gender identity doesn’t align with male or female, they might choose to use gender neutral pronouns. They/them/theirs are commonly used gender-neutral pronouns. For example, if you saw a lonely umbrella left at a café and it starts to rain you might say, “Someone left their umbrella here! They must be missing it right now.”
It can be tricky to adjust when you aren’t used to using a particular set of pronouns, or if someone in your life tells you they would like to change the pronouns they have been using. The most important thing is to do your best and correct yourself if you get it wrong. Using the correct pronouns for someone is a simple thing that you can do to have a really big impact. When we use correct pronouns, we are showing someone that their identity matters and they are safe with us.
Here are some ways that you can show your respect for a person’s chosen pronouns:
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When introducing yourself to someone, offer your pronouns first e.g. ‘Hi, I’m Carlee, I use she/her pronouns. It’s so nice to meet you.’
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Ask someone for their pronouns if you’re not sure. E.g. ‘What pronouns do you use?’
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Use the pronouns that someone has identified with. This can be tricky to get used to at first, but if you use the wrong pronoun just correct yourself and continue the conversation.
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Correct other people if they use the wrong pronoun when talking about someone, even if they aren’t around.
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Wear a pin or badge with your pronouns on them.
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Keep an open mind and take responsibility to educate yourself about pronouns and gender identities.
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